Reflections on Suffering and Loss

For my family and I, this past year was the most painful and difficult we’ve ever experienced. We suffered deep loss and grief. It’s hard to describe the intensity of it. I remember many nights, lying on the floor, thinking I would surely die from the agonies of a broken heart. It literally felt like my heart was being torn apart. Grief is a physical thing. You feel it in your bones and body.

But in those moments of complete vulnerability, I felt the presence and comfort of God as never before. I felt like a little child being held by my Heavenly Father. Psalm 56:8 says that God “keeps count of our night-time tossings, and puts our tears in a bottle.” It’s an expression of His deep care for us. He is not indifferent to our suffering. Our tears matter to God. 

One verse that has been very precious to me is Psalm 126:5 – “those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy.” The Bible says, every tear is a seed. Time sows the seeds. And then, one day, all those tears shed in agony will produce a vast harvest of joy, beyond counting. This is the promise of Scripture. We see the first installment of it in the resurrection of Jesus Christ. This gives me great comfort and hope.

Suffering can never destroy believers; it only ennobles and deepens the soul. It enlarges the heart’s capacity to receive Christ. It produces compassion for fellow sufferers. It gives grace and humility, which makes us useful for the Kingdom of God. And ultimately, when borne with patience and resilient joy, it gives God glory as all-sufficient and all-satisfying.